TLDR: The System is Fucked.

A friend of mine boldly shared this yesterday, and I appreciated the invitation to reflect more on what is happening here in Canada through this recent election:

The amount of hate I see on social media towards friends, followers and the like is truly shameful and disgusting. All because one person votes a different way than the other. There’s no unity anymore. People were friends with each other before this vote, and now there are hate posts, “delete me”, and a bunch of other wildly hateful phrases being thrown around overnight. Friends used to care about each other regardless of their beliefs, religion, race, etc. I am glad I know who my true friends are regardless of their political beliefs.

If you’re on social media like me, you’ve likely seen the posts of “If you voted conservative, delete me. We cannot be friends.” I was naively shocked to hear that the inverse is happening . . . “If you voted Liberal, you are the problem. Delete me and move on.”

It’s not easy living in a world where we can’t put things into buckets, or wrap them up with a pretty bow and call it done.

Fact is though, life is messy on the daily; And systems like this “democracy” we have in Canada, they are meant to silo us into buckets but these buckets don’t account for the nuance of day to day life and our beautiful, colourful existence as humans on this planet.

These buckets force people into groups based on “what fundamental need to you care about more”.

Your job?

Your home?

Your baseline existence as a trans human in this world?

WE SHOULD NEVER HAVE TO BARTER ABOUT THINGS WE ALL HAVE A FUNDAMENTAL RIGHT TO EXPERIENCE. EVER. FULL STOP.

This is how existence becomes political. The system made it this way.

I did not ask for this. And I presume, neither did you.

While I do genuinely want to feel the way my friend expressed, knowing people who love me also voted in a way that denounces my existence as a trans human means daily when I interact with them I am questioning if they truly do care, or if I am worthy of "real" love.

I am in partnership with someone who is in the oil industry and was raised in a very conservative way of thinking, so I absolutely understand the flip side of job insecurity and the fear that comes with that.

I think the difference is, one is an identity that I cannot change. Trust me, it would be a lot easier if I could.

The other . . . many people change careers multiple times in their lives.

Bottom line for all of us though: This stuff brings up legitimate fears for baseline needs for survival that NO ONE should have to barter against.

I didn't make one of these posts for this reason - none of the “if you voted conservative, unfriend me”. Because while I will definitively say I do not agree with you or condone what you did, I also empathize for the fact that you are also experiencing fear around these baseline things like I am.

You are having to make a choice you should never have to make.

Your Traumas are being exploited just like mine, to gain traction in a political race. And we are calling that “Democracy”? Fuck that.

It is so incredibly nuanced, but the system forces us to make it so polarized when it should not be and THAT is what I am most angry at. People I don't think want to be divisive. But the system is so fucked that they feel they have to be to exercise their rights and hold onto basics of support.

None of this makes me happy.

My existence shouldn't be political, but it is.

You shouldn’t have to choose food and economic stability over love for your friend.

And I shouldn’t have to negotiate between my right to live in this world and your right to food and water.

But that is how we are all feeling right now.

None of us should ever feel this way.

Ever.

And yes, some people do genuinely have a deep rooted hate for others and that is driving them forward. But I do believe strongly that more of this is rooted in fear.

So while yes, voting has created this very strong divide. We have a chance to unite in a mutual fight against the system that wants to divide us for its own clout. We do have a choice - like my friend said - to choose love, and choose one another, and fight for equitable access to things we all absolutely deserve.

You don’t have to understand my existence to decide I deserve safety.

I don’t have to understand yours to feel the same.